Self Arranged Marriage: Expectations vs Reality

Since, we live in India and as we are extremely concerned about society and what people say, marriage becomes a social phenomenon. So after a certain age, it becomes difficult to stay alone in this society. Some segments of society are too excited to see you married before you attain the age of 25 years while some segments are slightly liberal and don't mind waiting for another 2-3 years before they actually start to taunt you and pester you with questions on your marriage. It’s like seeing you married is the only thing left for them to live for. And it doesn't end there you also tend to receive continuous tantrums of your own people including your parents and married friends. Yes, it gets worse, you tend to doubt yourself and think as to really where you are lacking, the social pressure hits you hard. But, if you’re hopeful and open to change you might get to see the events you never expected.   

Nevertheless, lucky are those who find love early and are able to marry the one they love. But, for others sometimes it seems like an endless search. An arranged marriage is a feeble shot at some watered down version of love. You simply cannot throw two supposedly "compatible" individuals together and tell them to fall in love. Love is a spontaneous reaction. And some basic chemistry will tell you that chaos-creating spontaneous reactions tend to be exothermic. But, when you have no other option and when you do not want to go the typically arranged way, you tend to look for a self arranged marriage. Now, a self arranged marriage is different from the old fashioned arranged marriage only in one aspect that you search for your life partner yourself but of course the families are involved. The only difference is you meet each other first, try to judge the compatibility and then arrange the family meet. But, only if life was as easy as it seemed.

Now, let’s see how different our expectations are from the reality:

Expectation: You meet the guy; get to know him, then decide.

Reality: The families meet and decide amongst themselves, your opinion doesn't count.

Expectation: To have a good courtship period with beautiful magical moments.

Reality: Families start pestering you, "good you like each other, you should now exchange the rings".

Expectation: To fall in love and getting your dream proposal. 

Reality: Families already started giving you stress about marriage arrangement and managing the finances.

Expectation: To be happily married with the man you love for the rest of our life.

Reality: Families discuss about exchange of gifts, the kind of lavish wedding the girls side can arrange, etc.

Expectation: The man of your life will step up and fight for what's right and say I just want her, what I am going to do with these gifts anyway.

Reality: The man has a list too over and above the list of demands of his family.

Expectation: The man realizes what’s more important, the relationship or the list. 

Reality: The list is always given a priority.

Expectation: Things to work out somehow.

Reality: Things never work out until you fulfill the demand list.

Thus, I sometimes ponder is love possible in an arranged way?

What are your thoughts?

Art of Living fined by NGT

The NGT (National Green Tribunal) in-spite of appreciating Sri Sri's Art of Living Mission for hosting of the World Culture Festival on the flood plains of the river Yamuna fined the Foundation for ‘initial’ Environmental Compensation of Rs. 5 crores. This fine is imposed on the Art of Living Foundation as the NGT feels that the Foundation is liable to pay for the damage caused to the environment, ecology, biodiversity and aquatic life of the river.

The order of NGT is as below:

“For the damage caused to the environment, ecology, biodiversity and aquatic life of the river, the Foundation should be held liable for its restoration in all respects. In that regard and in exercise of our powers under Sections 15 and 17 of the NGT Act, 2010 we impose an Environmental Compensation, initially of Rs. 5 crores. This amount would be paid by the Foundation prior to the commencement of the event. This amount would be adjusted towards the final compensation determined to be paid by the Foundation for restoration work. We hereby direct the Principal Committee constituted under the judgment, to submit a report within four weeks from today, in relation to the steps required to be taken for restoration, restitution and rejuvenation of the flood plains to its original status. It will also state the approximate cost that would have to be incurred for such restoration and restitution. We further direct that the entire area in question shall be developed as a biodiversity park in terms of our judgment in the case of Manoj Mishra (supra). The cost thereof shall be paid by the Foundation and DDA in the proportion as would be directed by the Tribunal finally. For the reason of delay and laches on the part of the applicant in approaching the Tribunal and for the reason of fait accompli capable of restoration and restitution, we are unable to grant the prayer of prohibitory order and a mandatory direction for removal of construction and restoration of the area in question to the applicant at this stage.”

The foundation has so far already spent a total of Rs.25.63 crores on the event.

The Tribunal also imposed a fine of Rs. 5 lakhs on the DDA (Delhi Development Authority) and Rs. 1 lakh on the DPCC (Delhi Pollution Control Committee) which it described as incompetent for not discharging their statutory functions.

Thereafter, the Tribunal constituted a committee of representatives of Delhi Pollution Control Committee, the Union Environment Ministry and Central Pollution Control Board (CPCB), which should immediately inspect the site and issue directions Thursday in relation to the source of water, and collection and disposal of solid waste and sewerage.

Loosing Balance

Everyone feels pressed on and knows it personally, yet not very many of us ponder what stress really is. In today's social atmosphere anxiety is something that we only have a tendency to acknowledge as a piece of our home and workplace. We are taught that one must figure out how to unwind and assume responsibility of one's responses to outer occasions, individuals and circumstances. Thus one will discover peace and stay in proactive control over the feelings that have a tendency to show signs of improvement of us as the day progressed. In any case, managing push in a compelling and effective way goes past straightforward unwinding strategies and into the domain of viable anxiety administration methodologies. Powerful stress repairs includes overseeing what you consume, how you think, the way you treat your body, what moves you make on a steady premise, how you manage social relations, and what you have a tendency to abstain from doing. These key components of anxiety administration are the foundational obstructs that will help you to construct congruity with yourself, others and your quick surroundings. Develop them and apply them into your every day schedule, and you will discover joy where others just discover ruin and pandemonium. 5 Steps to Help Keep Stress from Beating You: 1. Move. The most ideal approach to smolder off the anxiety hormones without needing to change your reasoning is to move and sweat. Run, move, bounce, ride, swim, extend, or skip—do something incredible and vivacious. Yoga is likewise impressive, as it consolidates development and relaxing. 2. Relax. The vast majority of us hold our breath regularly or inhale swallow, on edge breaths. Profound, moderate, full breaths have a significant influence on resetting the anxiety reaction, on the grounds that the unwinding nerve (or vagus nerve and not the Las Vegas nerve) experiences your stomach and is actuated with each full breath. Take five full breaths now, and watch how distinctively you feel after. 3. Bathe. For the lethargic among us (counting me), a Ultrabath is a mystery weapon against anxiety. Include 2 glasses of salt which contains magnesium, the unwinding mineral, a half-measure of preparing pop, and 10 drops of lavender oil (which brings down cortisol) to an exceptionally hot shower. At that point, include one focused on human and douse for 20 minutes. Ensured to prompt unwinding. 4. Rest. Absence of slumber expands stress hormones. Get your eight hours regardless. Sleep in the event that you missed your slumber. Prioritize rest. 5. Think Differently. Hone the specialty of perceiving anxiety, recognizing how your reasoning makes you pushed. Work on taking full breaths and relinquishing stress. Life is riotous and startling things happen. The more you make time in your day for taking care of life's little curve balls, the all the more easily and placidly you will work. Showing up completely in your connections begins with assuming liability once again your anxiety response. When you see stretch as circumstance and you change your associations with anxiety, you feel more quiet, focused and grounded and you consequently captivate with others in a more true and positive way. I hope through this basic, solid lifestyle I can help keep stress from wrecking individuals' lives. By executing my 5 simple way of life steps, you can help free yourself from day by day push and move in the direction of accomplishing a more content and healthier perspective and life!

The modern India is not so modern after all

There has always been a debate on the perception of modernity. In India this debate is on even a wider level. As in India the transformation from traditional or religious dogma to scientific or rational thinking has been at it’s lowest. India has been engaged with rapid growth of higher education and rapid expansion of professional institutions. However, the scathing hand of the West has turned turtle the basic Indian psyche of happiness in scarcity, and, the same poor yet contented to have turned into an unhappy, rich, and neo-rich people. The education system in our country today has changed for the worse. The natural creative thought process in children has been shut down. Only the course material is given importance but reasoning it with real life isn’t important as the Teachers need to finish their portion in time. Hence, no class participation is encouraged. The only goal is to be bookworms to produce photocopy of what you swallow. All this is due to aggressive competition and in an aim to try to lead a lifestyle like the one in the west. The cultural complexity of India due to diversity in ecology, language, religion, family structure, and uneven introduction of technology. This context has shaped the course of higher education in general and psychology in particular. There is probably no other country where regional, caste and family loyalties are more important than the national interest. Corruption and division of society based on caste will ensure that India remains the same at the core. Our mindset (psyche) is such that it stops us from becoming a driving force to make a better India. Political parties exist in India to sustain one group of people in the country at the expense of a whole other than to promote a national agenda. This creates an inequality and deprivation for other groups. Thus, a cycle is created in which the group which was not in power earlier when comes into power conducts the same inequality created by the previous group which was in power earlier. Indian politicians do not hesitate to sell their country down the river and it does not require a high price. Therefore, we also need to look at psychological processes within cultural contexts, holistically. With these directions and prospects, the move toward indigenous psychology holds promise for the future of the country. The journey toward an indigenous psychology is in progress. First these strange alienated elite (dirty politics) have to be removed from the positions of power and influence, and they will not give up without a fight. Second this is not the psyche of a country which has the oldest culture in the world - it is the psyche of a culture that is continuously enslaved to foreign contacts. Thus, this dependency also needs to be reduced. Our mindset needs a change for the better, for a better India. Outer development without inner transformation of the psyche is not worth praising. We must rise. Education system should be changed and made more practical. People should be encouraged people to bring about change in fact even be the change. We need a renewed attitude to change India at the core. We need to develop and organize our thought process. One should always keep in mind that openness comes from within and not from the outside; likewise modernity comes from how one perceives things and not from what one shows from the outside. Thus, India really needs to adapt a hardworking and determined attitude to help bridge this gap between wisdom and foolishness and come out and deliver the most crucial necessity at this point of time to make a better India. As a failure to overcome this substandard thought process would lead us to a disastrous state and so I conclude that modern India is not so modern after all. Note: This post is not meant to hurt or offend anyone’s feelings, this post is just my opinion and your comments and feedbacks are welcomed.

Women Education And Media

As per Article 26, Universal Declaration of Human Rights (UDHR), “(1) Everyone has the right to education. Education shall be free, at least in the elementary and fundamental stages. Elementary education shall be compulsory. Technical and professional education shall be made generally available and higher education shall be equally accessible to all on the basis of merit. (2) Education shall be directed to the full development of the human personality and to the strengthening of respect for human rights and fundamental freedoms. It shall promote understanding, tolerance and friendship among all nations, racial or religious groups, and shall further the activities of the United Nations for the maintenance of peace. (3) Parents have a prior right to choose the kind of education that shall be given to their children.”

Universal Declaration of Human Rights (UDHR) is a declaration adopted by the United Nations General Assembly on the 10th of December 1948 at Palais de Chaillot, Paris. It consists of 30 articles which have been elaborated in subsequent international treaties, regional human rights instruments, national constitutions and laws. Out of all the 30 articles, Article 26 is the key to the foundation of securing the most basic of human rights i.e. right to education. This article sets out the social, economic and cultural rights.

To compete in today’s world in terms of employment opportunities, social status, success, etc education plays a very vital role to groom ones personality and boost self confidence. Education is very important for both girls and boys as it helps in the development of human dignity, there shall be no discrimination in the provision of education. There shall be availability of teaching and learning resources irrespective of the cost, language or location of the town/ village. The state is obliged to make available free education for women, improve the facilities and make available resources required for a better learning.

Education and Employment are interrelated. The more educated a women is the better are the employment opportunities. In the early 1980’s to late 1990’s the female work participation in India was very low as compared to other developing countries. Whereas, during 2004-2005 there was an increase in female work participation in the country. However, during 2009-2010 a gradual decline was seen. This was despite the rapid economic growth and many other changes in society. The main reason for this is low paid work and other part time work offered to women. Women workers remain stuck in low value-added but arduous work in agriculture. Around two-thirds of women workers are still employed in agriculture as their principal economic activity, while the share for men workers has fallen to less than half. The reason for this is that men are more educated than women. Thus, education is very essential to enable women to seek for better employment opportunities.

Despite the above the women in India face domestic violence, dowry demands, sexual assault, sexual violence, etc. There are so many cases reported each day regarding such crimes against women also not to forget the fact that there could be so many more unreported cases too. The role of legislators here is to maintain rule of law and to provide social and economic justice by protecting the weaker sections of the society. There shall be an awareness of law. Every women should know her rights. Educating women on legal aspects would not only make them aware but also give them strength in struggling times.

Another image of women in India that has grown in the recent years is the one that we have aped from the west and which gradually is gaining momentum. This is the portrayal of the woman as a showpiece or an icon of glamour. Many T.V. ads, T.V. Serials and Cinemas portray women as the stereotypes to increase their demand/ sales. Women are on commercials and magazine advertisements dressed in skimpy clothing selling everything from tires to pizza. All this stereotyping has a great effect on society. Children are especially vulnerable to this, since their young minds are still developing and learning about the world around them. We can stop this in one way simply by stop buying magazines that feature the sexist and damaging ads. Parents can teach their children that men are not smarter or stronger than women. Parental control should be made on T.V. channels.

Thus, Female Education is key to reduce tension between states and develop good relations. Ignorance of human rights is the ignorance of basic development of a human being and right to education is the vital element to inform individuals and groups of their rights.

Facebook, Happiness & Stock Market

Can you even imagine that Facebook sentiment has the ability to predict statistically significant and economically meaningful changes in the daily returns and trading volume in the equity market??

Well as records show it is true, it does happen so in the US equity market. A one-standard deviation increase in GNH (Gross National Happiness) predicts a statistically and economically significant average increase in next-day gross stock market return of 0.12%. This is purely a relation of the investment sentiments of the user and the stock market activity. Facebook publishes daily GNH (Gross National Happiness) which helps in analysis of the next-day stock market return. Mostly these Facebook sentiments are used to forecast returns among small-cap and growth stocks that are consistent with the noise trader models. Also another amazing fact is that, the assessment of GNH (gross national happiness) was designed in an attempt to define an indicator that measures quality of life or social progress in more holistic and psychological terms than only the economic indicator of gross domestic product (GDP).

Well in India there is a long way to go for Facebook statistical reports to predict the NSE or BSE equity levels as most of the investors don’t even use Facebook rather don’t have Facebook accounts, but nevertheless felt this topic interesting to write about so I went ahead and did it anyway... Also, keep in mind Orkut used to be the undefeated leader in the social network in India. No one came even close to challenging them until Facebook came along. Now, Google also have their own social network, which may or may not mean the end of Facebook's reign.

My study was base on the following Source : http://lawprofessors.typepad.com/business_law

Please leave down your suggestions and reviews. Thank You.

The Science of Social Media

The Web is becoming social, and companies are jumping to capture the investment rupees. The real science of social media is about why people behave the way they do online and how we as marketers can leverage that behavior to engineer contagious ideas. Also there is a social media economics which helps us valuate business models and advertising effectiveness. It's the social science that analyzes the production, distribution, and consumption of content amongst online social outlets. Thus, market research, web development, innovation, software animation, robust marketing strategies combined together form the science of social media.